Category: Joke Board
An old lady at the bank asked me if I'd help her to check her balance...So I pushed her.
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Two antennas got married. The ceremony wasn't that good, but the reception was excellent.
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Did you hear about the pregnant bed bug?
She's having her baby in the spring.
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My grandpa has the heart of a lion.........And a lifetime ban from the zoo.
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Two men walked into a bar. The third one ducked.
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Two midgets walked into a bar, they promptly got up, dusted themselves off, looked around to make sure no-one was watching, and went their separate ways.
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A man walks into a bar with a piece of asphalt under his arm and says: "I'll have a shot of whiskey, and a beer for the road."
A 3-legged dog walks into a bar and shouts: "I'm lookin' for the man that shot my paw!"
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A mushroom walks into a bar. The bartender says: "Sorry, we don't serve mushrooms here." The mushroom says: "Why not? I'm a fungi!"
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A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says: "I'll serve you, but don't start anything."
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A fried egg, a pancake, and a strip of bacon walk into a bar. The bartender says: "Sorry, we don't serve breakfast here."
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I used to be addicted to soap, but now I'm clean.
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A pirate walks into a bar.
Bartender: "Excuse me sir, but you've got a steering wheel on your belt."
Pirate: "ARGH! You're drivin' me nuts!"
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A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says: "Hey, did you know we've got a drink named after you?" The grasshopper says: "Really? You've got a drink named George?"
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Singing in the shower is all fun & games till you get shampoo in your mouth. Then it becomes a soap opera.
You cannot run in a camping ground. You can only ran, because it is past tents.
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So, I'm in the debate team. I don't wanna be in the debate team, but damn they're good!
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My husband and I divorced over religious reasons. He thought he was god and I didn't.
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lol hahaha